Ladies and gentlemen, prepare yourselves for a wild ride through the untamed world of animal-shaped guitars. From the creepy to the hilarious, these bizarre beasts of the guitar kingdom will have you laughing, crying, and maybe even questioning the sanity of their creators. Get ready to embark on a strumming safari as we explore the top 7 animal-inspired guitars that you simply have to see to believe!
1. Lucy the Dog-tar: A Strumming Nightmare
When we first laid eyes on Lucy the Dog-tar, we couldn’t help but do a double-take.
Intended to be an adorable fusion of man’s best friend and our favorite instrument, the result is… well, unsettling.
It’s as if the designer had a twisted sense of humor and wanted to make us all feel like we were playing a sadistic game of fetch.
With Lucy hanging by the headstock from her neck, you can’t help but wonder if she’s auditioning for a role in the next canine horror movie. But hey, maybe the hanging dog look is a secret weapon for keeping this pup-tar in tune. After all, who needs a guitar tuner when you’ve got a creepy, suspended dog staring back at you?
2. The Croco-Tele: A Reptilian Rocker
The designer of this beastly guitar must have been inspired by the lyrics “See you later, alligator” – because they’ve certainly given us a Telecaster that’s crawled straight out of the swamps. With its reptilian skin finish and an upper horn carved into the shape of a crocodile (or is it an alligator?), this bizarre instrument is sure to turn heads and raise a few eyebrows.
One can’t help but wonder if playing this Croco-Tele requires a degree in herpetology or if strumming it might come with a side of swamp fever.
But hey, if you ever wanted to add a touch of Jurassic Park to your guitar collection, this wild-looking Telecaster is just the ticket! Let’s just hope it doesn’t snap at your fingers when you hit that high note.
3. The Stratocowster: Udderly Amoosing
Who says guitar design has to be all serious business? The Stratocowster is here to prove that sometimes, it’s okay to embrace the silly side of things.
This cow-shaped Stratocaster is a prime example of what happens when you mix bovine inspiration with a love for rock ‘n’ roll.
Perfect for all the cowboys out there, the Stratocowster is an a-moo-sing choice for playing some good old country moo-sic. And let’s face it, with this quirky guitar in hand, you’ll definitely stand out from the herd. Don’t be surprised if your bandmates start calling you the “Cow Whisperer” or if cows from nearby farms start mooing along to your tunes.
4. The Catastrophe: A Fur-ocious Guitar Fail
If you thought animal-shaped guitars couldn’t get any creepier, think again. Introducing the stuffed cat guitar – a chilling creation that’s bound to make your fur stand on end.
This eerie instrument is the brainchild of Chilean artist Caterina Purdy, who enjoys turning deceased animals into everyday objects.
While she sees her work as beautiful, ironic, and a critique of how animals are treated, we can’t help but feel a little unnerved.
As far as naming this monstrosity goes, it’s hard to decide between a Strato-cat-er, a Tele-cat-er, or just a straight-up Guitar Fail. Whatever you choose to call it, this feline fretboard is guaranteed to leave anyone more petrified than purring.
Luckily, this macabre masterpiece was never meant to be a functional guitar ! Imagine going on stage with that thing. You’d have to be prepared for some hissing and howling from the fans – and we don’t mean the good kind.
5. The Jaws-tar: A Fin-tastic Guitar
Animal-shaped guitars have a habit of being creepy, like the unsettling dog-tar and the disturbing cat guitar.
But every now and then, a luthier gets it right and gives us something hilariously entertaining – like the udderly awesome cow-shaped Stratocaster.
Enter the shark guitar – a fin-tastic addition to our collection of animal-inspired axes. Though sharks have a fearsome reputation, their guitar counterparts are surprisingly more comical than terrifying.
The shark guitar is a perfect example of how you can take a dreaded predator from the deep and turn it into a giggle-inducing, six-stringed spectacle.
It would be funny to see a guitarist shredding on stage with a shark guitar in hand, and as he dives into the next solo, the audience starts humming the Jaws theme.
6. The Telecrapster: A Hiss-terical Guitar Mishap
Slithering its way onto our list is the Telecrapster, a guitar that tries to be a rattlesnake but ends up looking more like… well, let’s just say it’s not quite living up to its venomous inspiration. If you squint, you might see the snake’s head hovering above the neck pickup, but we wouldn’t blame you for missing it entirely.
But the carved poop rattlesnake (or attempt at one) isn’t the only odd thing about this guitar.
The builder seems to have Frankensteined together the hardware and electronics of a Telecaster with the bottom half of an SG body, creating a bizarre hybrid that leaves us scratching our heads.
Unfortunately, we couldn’t find a picture of the headstock, but we can only imagine what sort of reptilian disaster awaits there. The Telecrapster is undoubtedly a unique addition to our list – a guitar that will leave your audience both puzzled and amused, wondering what kind of mad scientist dreamt up this slithery six-string.
7. The Duck Bass: A Quacky Creation
Behold, a bass guitar that’s truly fowl in nature – the duck bass! No, it’s not a Donald “Duck” Dunn signature model, but we can’t help but think that the creator might have been trying to channel the spirit of the legendary bassist himself.
Quack, quack, quack! This duck-shaped bass is definitely one for the books.
For those who need a refresher, Donald “Duck” Dunn was an iconic bass player, known for his work with countless acts including Booker T. & the M.G.’s, and The Blues Brothers. But as far as we know, he never played a duck-shaped bass – though we can’t help but wonder what he’d think of this feathery fretboard.
And before we wrap this up, here is a bonus one…
8. The Dolph-tar: A Flip(per)-flopped Design
Swimming into our list is the Dolph-tar – a guitar shaped like a dolphin that’s sure to make a splash, though not necessarily for the right reasons.
With a dorsal fin that seems to be more of a hindrance than a helpful design feature, this guitar might just have you questioning the intentions of its creator.
Now, let’s take a moment to compare this aquatic oddity to the shark guitar we mentioned earlier.
It’s an interesting contrast – while the shark guitar took a notoriously scary animal and turned it into a funny and charming instrument, the Dolph-tar seems to have missed the mark by turning a lovable creature into something… well, just oozing cuteness.
What a missed opportunity, right ? We are patient anyway, we know for sure that one of these days, someone, somewhere will make the scary dolphin-shaped guitar ! As with many things in life, expectations can be deceiving but they most often are met !
And there you have it, folks – our top 8 list of animal-inspired guitars that are equal parts hilarious and bewildering. Whether you’re looking for a guitar that quacks you up or one that leaves you pondering the mysteries of the universe, these unique creations prove that the world of guitar design is truly a wild and wacky place. So, next time you’re in the market for a new axe, why not consider going on a little guitar safari? You never know what kind of bizarre, beastly beauty you might find lurking in the depths of the instrument jungle!